The Riddle-Master of Hed
{4/5} “You are Sol of Isig, caught up by fear between death and a door that has been closed for thousands of years. If you have no faith in yourself, then have faith in the things you call truth. You know what must be done.” The Riddle-Master of Hed by Patricia A. McKillip, published in […]
Shrek the Third
{4/5} “This is like totally embarrassing, but my friend Tiffany thinkest thou vex her so soothly and she thought perchance thou would want to ask her to the homecoming dance or something.” Shrek the Third, released in 2010 Shrek and Fiona are filling in for the king and queen while the king is sick, but […]
Mystery Men
{4/5} “‘If one person vomits in my pool, I’m going to divorce you.’ ‘That’s fair.’” Mystery Men, released in 1999 The Shoveler, the Blue Raja, and Mr. Furious are superheroes, sort of. They try to be helpful, but they’re really not very good at it. Captain Amazing, on the other hand, is a professional. But […]
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny
{4/5} “Hold my horse.” Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, released in 2023 Indiana Jones’s friend Basil was obsessed with the antikythera, built by Archimedes. The two of them took half of it from the Nazis in the old days. Now Basil’s daughter, Helena, has taken it from Indy and intends to sell it […]
Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder
{4/5} “‘Why do you always get to read the top story, Morbo?’ ‘Because viewers trust a deep male voice, and huge throbbing forehead veins.’” Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder, released in 2009 Everyone’s having fun at Mars Vegas, which is owned by Amy’s parents. But Fry finds he can hear people’s thoughts, until he […]
Futurama: Bender’s Big Score
{4/5} “Finally, I get to save the Earth with deadly laser instead of deadly slide shows.” — Al Gore’s head Futurama: Bender’s Big Score, released in 2007 After Professor Farnsworth falls prey to an email scam, he finds that aliens have taken over his company. Bender has downloaded a virus so he now obeys the […]
The Addams Family 2
{4/5} “I didn’t want to be an Addams. I struggled with feeling different. But now I realize that being different is the most Addams-y thing there is.” The Addams Family 2, released in 2021 The Addams family decides to go on a road trip. A lawyer comes to tell them that Wednesday may have been […]
Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull
{4/5} “If you want to be a good archaeologist, you’ve got to get out of the library.” Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, released in 2008 A Russian named Irina Spalko gets away with the corpse of a Roswell alien from Area 51, and Indiana Jones barely gets away with his life. […]
I’ll Follow You Down
{4/5} “Every time I try to commit to this life, something tells me that I shouldn’t.” I’ll Follow You Down aka Continuum, released in 2013 When Gabriel doesn’t return from a conference, Marika gets worried and calls the hotel. He’s still checked in — he’s not in his room but his stuff is there. Her […]
Infinity Chamber
{4/5} “I don’t know what you think I’ve done, or who you think I am, but it’s a mistake.” Infinity Chamber, released in 2016 Frank wakes up not knowing where he is — he was shot in the back by a stun gun. He’s been detained for some reason by the ISN and he can’t […]